An idea that Wayne Dyer once wrote was around “detaching from the outcome”. I interpret it that you set your sights on what you want, you put things in motion, and then you detach from the outcome. Being too attached or “controlling” of how things go down can sometimes work against us.
My husband and I are currently selling one of our properties. The first offer that came in was a low ball, and although we were tempted to see the deal close quickly, we rejected it. Sure enough, just days later, a better offer came through.
We detached from the outcome.
The same applies when a client comes to you with a crazy low fee.When you get hung up in taking the engagement (because it is a cool company, it is a perfect audience, it is a piece of business), you are in a less powerful negotiating position.
When your fee is $10K, and your prospect says, “our budget is $5K”, you might come back with, “While I’d love to work with you, we’re not quite in the ballpark, what do you think we might do to make this a win-win?”
By asking an open ended question, we might be surprised with their response. “Let me see if I can move some money from another budget.”
Michael Hoffman shares this advice when it comes to negotiating:
“When negotiating remember to stay detached from the emotion of the numbers, which is not easy because this is usually where the discussion becomes personal. We move from two people having a conversation about needs to two people going into a relationship where money is exchanged. Never be afraid of asking for the numbers. The price, budget or asking for other areas of funds are just more info for the solution. It is just data, and it is just zeros. Whether it is requesting data or presenting options, stay detached from the numbers.”
Another example of letting go is when we are trying to build our business. Let’s say we pick a lane, but people keep coming to us with business from the old lanes. While it’s hard to let go of business that’s easy, sometimes it does not serve us long term to be the jack of all trades.
[Tweet “Letting go of easy #business is hard, but it doesn’t serve to be a jack of all trades.”]
A good question to ask yourself is “will this piece of business get me where I ultimately want to go?” If the answer is “no”, then you have to reconsider. Detach from the outcome. I understand, of course, that sometimes you want to make sure you can pay the mortgage. This might be a process – maybe you work towards your “ideal lane” over 12-24 months. Start small with letting go and work towards your goal.
I know that many of you have stories of when you let go, and something good happened. Will you please share them in our comments section below?
See you soon Wealthy Speakers!
P.S. Part of the reason people like having a coach is that I can ask them the tough questions and help them let go. Do you need help letting go of things that aren’t serving you? Check out my Focus 40 Session – I can help you make the tough decisions!
